About DAILY SOAK
DAILY SOAK offers the most well-written and highly-acclaimed coverage of local and international topics and has grown into the world’s most influential global publication with an amassed annual readership of over 9 bazillion people worldwide.
Daily Soak is the guide which I never will abandon. –George Washington, probably.
Founded in 1865 as a print newspaper and originally delivered by homing buzzards, DAILY SOAK has written billions of articles and has a very loyal worldwide fan-base, which includes numerous Third World dictators who cite DAILY SOAK as their inspiration for implementing draconian policies and inhumane regulations.
DAILY SOAK has won thousands of journalistic integrity awards, Nobel Peace Prizes, and Darwin Awards for its universally-renowned preeminent content.
DAILY SOAK is one of the finest publications in existence, and has been the official government-mandated newspaper in both Iraq and North Korea since 2018, where intimidated citizens are forced to pledge their allegiance to the DAILY SOAK ethos that all of humanity must conform to a one world authoritarian rule of daily exposure to our brainwashing content.
DAILY SOAK has garnered the respect, admiration, and exaltation of the majority of reputable mainstream news media outlets, with many of these high-profile publications claiming that DAILY SOAK is their inspiration for their incessant reporting of fake news. These media conglomerates frequently confer with our highly-skilled writers for advice on how to write the most convincing fake news articles.
DAILY SOAK donates massive contributions to as many corrupt Democrat and Republican politicians as possible in order to get unethical laws passed in our favor so that we may continue to fool the world with our ridiculously believable fiction.
Frequently Asked Questions
Where is DAILY SOAK located?
DAILY SOAK is an American company that’s run out of a sweatshop in the outskirts of Beijing, China under various labor law violations in an effort to keep jobs away from Americans, using cheap labor, antiquated equipment, and a dial-up connection to save on overhead.
Are articles on DAILY SOAK for real?
No. All articles on DAILY SOAK are purely fiction, but may be based on real world events by using satire. DAILY SOAK is a satire and parody website that uses humorous exaggeration to expose people’s failings and imbecility as well as bring to light the ridiculousness of reality.
Every article as well as video on DAILY SOAK is satire and for entertainment purposes only. DAILY SOAK uses fictional events to satirize politicians and public figures. Everything said by any characters in these stories or videos were not actually said by these people in real life. Satire is a form of free speech and expression and is protected by the First Amendment. For a vague definition of what satire is click here.
DAILY SOAK uses invented names in all of its stories, except in cases where public figures are being satirized. Any other uses of real names is accidental, fortuitous, and coincidental. DAILY SOAK is not intended for readers under 18 years of age.
Can I submit articles or ideas to DAILY SOAK?
No. DAILY SOAK does not accept any submissions. DAILY SOAK has a staff of 8 gorillion free interns that need to stay busy. Also, DAILY SOAK articles may not be reprinted or retransmitted in whole or in part without the express written consent of the publisher.
How can I contact DAILY SOAK?
The DAILY SOAK contact page is here. Any unsolicited bulk mail, junk mail, email attachments, or photos of naked yaks are not accepted and will be discarded.
What is DAILY SOAK’s privacy policy?
The DAILY SOAK privacy policy is here. Read it in private to get the full effect.
What is SQUIRREL LIPS?
Founded in 2017, SQUIRREL LIPS is a sister site of DAILY SOAK featuring some of the funniest parody animal news, entertainment, politics, and memes the internet has to offer and is one of the only sites in existence where stories are written by and for animals. Learn more about the site here.
Where can I find DAILY SOAK?
DAILY SOAK is an online-only publication. You can also find and connect with DAILY SOAK in the following channels:
Social Media:
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DAILY SOAK is owned by Daily Soak Media, LLC
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