Bernie Sanders<\/a>, his existing three homes simply lacked the storage capacity required to wage a proper war against excessive wealth.<\/p>\n“We are facing an unprecedented crisis in this country,” Sanders told reporters from inside of the newly acquired property. “Nobody\u2014and I mean nobody\u2014needs a trillion dollars. One man now has a trillion dollars while millions of Americans struggle to afford housing. That is why I had no choice but to purchase this modest 4,500-square-foot secondary-secondary-secondary home to warehouse the thousands of freshly printed lawn signs needed to fight this oligarchy.”<\/p>\n
According to campaign insiders, Sanders’ speechwriters have been working to permanently remove the word “millionaire” from his vocabulary, a demographic the Senator gracefully forgave the moment he himself became a multimillionaire.<\/p>\n
At press time, Sanders was reportedly seen browsing Zillow for a fifth home in the Swiss Alps, noting that if Musk becomes a quadrillionaire by 2030, the campaign is going to need a much larger garage.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
BURLINGTON, VERMONT \u2014 Following reports that Elon Musk had officially become the world’s first trillionaire, Senator Bernie Sanders announced Saturday that he had purchased a fourth home to store his massive new shipment of “Tax the Trillionaires” protest signs. The real estate acquisition, which marks the democratic socialist\u2019s fourth residential property, was deemed an “absolute […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":37294,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[403,404,1344,1113],"class_list":["post-37293","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-politics","tag-bernie-sanders","tag-democrat","tag-elon-musk","tag-rated-g"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/dailysoak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37293","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/dailysoak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/dailysoak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dailysoak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dailysoak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=37293"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/dailysoak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37293\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dailysoak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/37294"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/dailysoak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=37293"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dailysoak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=37293"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dailysoak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=37293"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}