SACRAMENTO, CALIFORNIA– Finally deciding to hold the person responsible behind the decline of The Golden State, California Governor Gavin Newsom reportedly was seen in his Sacramento mansion angrily confronting his own mirror reflection, who he claims is the man “single-handedly destroying California.” According to sources inside the Governor\u2019s Mansion, the incident began when Newsom approached his mirror and \u201cdemanded answers\u201d from the man \u201cwho ruined everything.\u201d<\/p>\n
Witnesses say the governor launched into a fiery tirade, accusing his mirror image of letting crime soar, driving away businesses, and somehow turning San Francisco into a live-action dystopian art installation.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou did this!\u201d Gavin Newsom shouted, wagging a finger at his mirrored adversary. \u201cYou\u2019re the reason people can\u2019t afford to live here anymore! You\u2019re the one who thought it was a good idea to legalize chaos! You’re the one who legalized shoplifting! Who let MS-13 run our streets! You’re the one who raised taxes so high even Elon Musk left!”<\/p>\n
The mirror-Gavin immediately started mocking the governor by repeating everything he was saying at the same time, causing Newsom<\/a> to attempt to punch the mirror, only to recoil in pain after breaking a painted fingernail.<\/p>\n Aides reportedly found Newsom hours later, still yelling at the glass. “I know it’s you! I know you’re behind the droughts and the wildfires. You’re a monster who looks exactly like me! No wonder everyone thinks I’m the one ruining California with failed Democrat policies!”<\/p>\n