{"id":1829,"date":"2016-05-11T23:02:50","date_gmt":"2016-05-12T04:02:50","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/dailysoak.com\/?p=1829"},"modified":"2026-01-04T14:10:47","modified_gmt":"2026-01-04T19:10:47","slug":"cia-hacks-into-kim-jong-uns-secret-facebook-account-3-photos","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dailysoak.com\/index.php\/2016\/05\/11\/cia-hacks-into-kim-jong-uns-secret-facebook-account-3-photos\/","title":{"rendered":"CIA Hacks Into Kim Jong-un’s Secret Facebook Account (3 Photos)"},"content":{"rendered":"

WASHINGTON– Despite several attempts by President Obama\u00a0to trick\u00a0the North Korean dictator\u00a0into friending him on Facebook, Kim Jong-un has continually insisted that, not only does he\u00a0not have a Facebook account, but that he never even heard of the social networking site. In response, the Central Intelligence Agency used technologically advanced high school students to bypass North Korea’s tight network security, locate Kim’s account, and then hack into it using a complex two letter password.<\/p>\n

During a press conference in\u00a0Washington, President Obama gave a long-winded explanation\u00a0for the event that actually only took the high school students five minutes to accomplish. As he spoke, a large screen behind him flashed numerous photos that were retrieved from Kim Jong-un’s elusive Facebook account.<\/p>\n

\"Funny
Kim at a young age. One of the photos on his Facebook account that had the caption \u201cMy first steps toward world domination.\u201d<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

“Our intelligence agency in Washington,” said Obama, signaling for the teleprompter to stand still, “has broken through North Korea’s tight defense and has located Supreme Leader Kim Jong-un’s Facebook account, which he stated on several occasions that he didn’t have.<\/p>\n

“In this never-ending battle against ISIL, or ISIS, or whatever they’re called,” he added as his eyes welled up with vacation withdrawal, “we need to try as best as we can to get the upper hand on these terrorists. Our intelligence showed that North Korea’s leader was in fact working with ISIL or ISIS and that Mr. Kim was planning on sending his North Korean army into Syria dressed as Islamic terrorists to overthrow our own militants in Syria. As you can see behind me in the next photo, Mr. Kim used various disguises to thwart United States intelligence.”<\/p>\n

\"Funny
Photo of Kim and possibly his wife or sister in disguise. Obama says that for some reason he remembers seeing this photo on an email Hillary Clinton mistakenly sent to him.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

According to reports from South Korea, Kim Jong-un recently sent over a million troops dressed in burkas into Syria under the cloak of darkness right\u00a0after\u00a0he\u00a0turned off the country’s power\u00a0at 8 p.m.<\/p>\n

President Obama warns that this bold move by Kim could lead to disastrous consequences.<\/p>\n

“I posted all Kim’s photos on my own Facebook account,” Obama laughed as he showed the crowd of news reporters a few more photos. “If Kim want’s to play hardball then I can get even harder. Me posting all his photos to the world will expose this tyrant for the megalomaniac that he really is and also force Kim to once and for all make a decision on which presidential candidate he supports: Trump or Clinton. We’ve already had the misfortune of hearing Putin’s support for Mr. Trump. I’m sure if Mr. Kim throws his support Trump’s way then we’ll be hearing about it all over Twitter.”<\/p>\n

\"Funny
On Kim\u2019s Facebook page he used messenger to send this photo to a friend in San Francisco, writing that this day was the happiest of his life.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

When asked by reporters what the next move for the White House is going to be, President Obama was adamant. “This new evidence about North Korea sending over a million Islamic, Korean-looking troops into Syria will probably be the start of World War III, I hate to say. And more bad news, our sources in the C.I.A. tell me that my services are needed once again in Hawaii as there’s some new evidence that’s come to light about these, um, terrorists hiding out inside these beachfront vacation bungalows.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

WASHINGTON– Despite several attempts by President Obama\u00a0to trick\u00a0the North Korean dictator\u00a0into friending him on Facebook, Kim Jong-un has continually insisted that, not only does he\u00a0not have a Facebook account, but that he never even heard of the social networking site. In response, the Central Intelligence Agency used technologically advanced high school students to bypass North […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":4150,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[108,270,271,181,182,66,119,757,1115,145],"class_list":["post-1829","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-politics","tag-baby","tag-c-i-a","tag-facebook","tag-fetish","tag-isis","tag-kim-jong-un","tag-korea","tag-north-korea","tag-rated-r","tag-syria"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/dailysoak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1829","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/dailysoak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/dailysoak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dailysoak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dailysoak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1829"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/dailysoak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1829\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dailysoak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/4150"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/dailysoak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1829"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dailysoak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1829"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dailysoak.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1829"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}